I am trying to work through a thought model that I would like some feedback on. I actually feel very confident in my ability to live in a non-diet way and to run a business that coaches other women to do the same BUT the last couple of weeks I am feeling overwhelmed with the VERY LOUD diet culture messaging going on right now (new year). I am trying to reframe some of those negative thoughts in another way as not to let them interfere with my ability to do for myself and for others what I know I am completely capable of doing…
C: Lots of diet messaging and talk everywhere right now
TD: How can all these people actually believe promoting diets is a good practice? What if they are all right and I am wrong? It is so obvious to me how futile and borderline unethical the diet messaging is; why is it not obvious to them? Am I missing something? I am having a hard time competing with the “diet noise”. I only have 3 clients signed up for my coaching program this month – I cannot compete with the diet industry.
F: Overwhelmed, annoyed, insecure, disappointed
A: I hesitate to put myself out there. I am unfollowing a bunch of social media accounts that promote diet culture (which I think is a good thing)… but I should be doing it out of respect for myself and not anger at them. The overwhelm is making content creation in my own programming more difficult.
R: I only have 3 new clients starting this month
I am not sure if I have thought through this in the correct order… would you be able to give me feedback and help me set up the new model I need to adopt?
Thanks!
ANSWER
Hello!
Well done showing up for coaching.
I’m going to coach you on two angles: 1- technical application of the self-coaching model (because you are a PRO). 2- the thinking errors.
1- Technical Coaching
This will help you understand the real issue. Refining your technical self-coaching skill will allow you to find the CORE beliefs behind the suffering.
The C is not neutral. “LOTS” is an option. “Everywhere” is an opinion.
Our brains resist seeing C as neutral. Holding back seeing C as neutral allows our brain to justify our T as facts.
Neutral C: Words (or message) from diet culture in January
We recommend not having questions in a thought download as it hides a real T. Again, your brain present you from seeing the real T so it can keep thinking it. For example: “How can all these people actually believe promoting diets is a good practice?” might mean: “People believe diets are good.” It would make sense of a non-diet practitioner brain to think this as it would likely produce an F of insecurity A of procrastination or praralysis.
Challenge each question in your T and get to the real T.
You need to break down each mean T in an individual model so you can determine which T creates which F and A. That’s essential to understand yourself better and truly to see where and how you can create change.
C: Words from diet culture in January
T: I’m wrong about non-diet way
F: ??? (insecure?)
A: I hesitate to put myself out there, _Overthinking?____ (what else do you do when you feel insecure professionally?)
R: My non-diet practice is dangerous
C: Words from diet culture in January
T: I still believe diet messaging
F: ??? (disappointed)
A: I hesitate to put myself out there, I create content from anger instead of compassion, I’m not confident in my program, so it’s harder to sell it to others, _____ (what else do you do when you feel disappointed?)
R: I resonate to diet culture noise in January
C: Words from diet culture in January
T: It’s hard to compete with diet culture
F: ??? (Overwhelmed?)
A: I do not create as much marketing content, I take action from anger, I’m not confident in my marketing, I market my business from a place of fear, I overthink the next step, I ruminate as to why diet culture is better than me, ______ (what else do you do when you feel overwhelmed?)
R: I prove to myself that it’s hard to compete OR I continue to believe I need to compete
You need to complete each model and dig deeper to get to the root cause… The big belief that causes you to believe diet culture messaging.
When people say they are triggered by something, it simply means that other people’s words or thought are reflecting a belief in them that they are ashamed of or do not know they still hold. Go and listen to podcast #262 – Beyond The Food podcast.
Other people’s words (diet culture noise) aren’t what create these emotions in you. It’s your thought about the diet culture noise that creates your emotions. So my guess is that somewhere within you, you still believe diet culture message.
Which part of diet culture are you still uncertain about? Is it all food is good? Is it the health part of thinner is better?
Or maybe you believe that you need to compete with diet culture instead of forging your own path?
As far as intentional model: It’s hard for me to help you set one up until we can know exactly what the core belief is about.
C: All food are good
C: Health is available at any size
C: Other people’s words
C: Competing with diet culture
There so many ways you can go with this. I would suggest you do the way I coach you with and then see what happens. Submit, and we can work on an intuitional model.
C: Lots of diet messaging and talk everywhere right now
TD: How can all these people actually believe promoting diets is a good practice? What if they are all right and I am wrong? It is so obvious to me how futile and borderline unethical the diet messaging is; why is it not obvious to them? Am I missing something? I am having a hard time competing with the “diet noise”. I only have 3 clients signed up for my coaching program this month – I cannot compete with the diet industry.
F: Overwhelmed, annoyed, insecure, disappointed
A: I hesitate to put myself out there. I am unfollowing a bunch of social media accounts that promote diet culture (which I think is a good thing)… but I should be doing it out of respect for myself and not anger at them. The overwhelm is making content creation in my own programming more difficult.
R: I only have 3 new clients starting this month
I am not sure if I have thought through this in the correct order… would you be able to give me feedback and help me set up the new model I need to adopt?
Thanks!
ANSWER
Hello!
Well done showing up for coaching.
I’m going to coach you on two angles: 1- technical application of the self-coaching model (because you are a PRO). 2- the thinking errors.
1- Technical Coaching
This will help you understand the real issue. Refining your technical self-coaching skill will allow you to find the CORE beliefs behind the suffering.
The C is not neutral. “LOTS” is an option. “Everywhere” is an opinion.
Our brains resist seeing C as neutral. Holding back seeing C as neutral allows our brain to justify our T as facts.
Neutral C: Words (or message) from diet culture in January
We recommend not having questions in a thought download as it hides a real T. Again, your brain present you from seeing the real T so it can keep thinking it. For example: “How can all these people actually believe promoting diets is a good practice?” might mean: “People believe diets are good.” It would make sense of a non-diet practitioner brain to think this as it would likely produce an F of insecurity A of procrastination or praralysis.
Challenge each question in your T and get to the real T.
You need to break down each mean T in an individual model so you can determine which T creates which F and A. That’s essential to understand yourself better and truly to see where and how you can create change.
C: Words from diet culture in January
T: I’m wrong about non-diet way
F: ??? (insecure?)
A: I hesitate to put myself out there, _Overthinking?____ (what else do you do when you feel insecure professionally?)
R: My non-diet practice is dangerous
C: Words from diet culture in January
T: I still believe diet messaging
F: ??? (disappointed)
A: I hesitate to put myself out there, I create content from anger instead of compassion, I’m not confident in my program, so it’s harder to sell it to others, _____ (what else do you do when you feel disappointed?)
R: I resonate to diet culture noise in January
C: Words from diet culture in January
T: It’s hard to compete with diet culture
F: ??? (Overwhelmed?)
A: I do not create as much marketing content, I take action from anger, I’m not confident in my marketing, I market my business from a place of fear, I overthink the next step, I ruminate as to why diet culture is better than me, ______ (what else do you do when you feel overwhelmed?)
R: I prove to myself that it’s hard to compete OR I continue to believe I need to compete
You need to complete each model and dig deeper to get to the root cause… The big belief that causes you to believe diet culture messaging.
When people say they are triggered by something, it simply means that other people’s words or thought are reflecting a belief in them that they are ashamed of or do not know they still hold. Go and listen to podcast #262 – Beyond The Food podcast.
Other people’s words (diet culture noise) aren’t what create these emotions in you. It’s your thought about the diet culture noise that creates your emotions. So my guess is that somewhere within you, you still believe diet culture message.
Which part of diet culture are you still uncertain about? Is it all food is good? Is it the health part of thinner is better?
Or maybe you believe that you need to compete with diet culture instead of forging your own path?
As far as intentional model: It’s hard for me to help you set one up until we can know exactly what the core belief is about.
C: All food are good
C: Health is available at any size
C: Other people’s words
C: Competing with diet culture
There so many ways you can go with this. I would suggest you do the way I coach you with and then see what happens. Submit, and we can work on an intuitional model.