I am on the Confident section and putting together my self-coaching models. I’d like feedback on whether I am doing them correctly.
C: New clothes delivered to the house
TD: Will they fit, will I like them on my body, will I be making a trip to the store to return them, will I have to get a larger size
T: Will they fit
E: Anxiety
A: Procrastinate trying on till I’m “in the mood,” psych myself up to try them on
R: Try on clothes in a stressed and critical state
Is this correct?
Here is another:
C: Ate a lot of food again
TD: I’m weak, I’ll get fat, I’m a bad person, I’m going to gain weight
T: I’m weak
A: Next day only eating “healthy” foods and no snacking
R: Restricting again!
Is this OK?
One other question: is there a place you have the definitions of each component of the Self Coaching model? For example, Stephanie refers to Action as “do or do not do.” What is the short definition of each component of the model?
Thanks!!!
ANSWER
Hello!
Overall, my sister, you are doing great work! Very well done!
I’ll coach you on the specifics so you can get your self-coaching game to the next level.
The structure is perfect! Where you need to push to the next level is to individualize each thought so you can see the full impact of thinking this way… Also, don’t be shy on the A line: take the time to explore all the behaviours you have. I like to write it as A’s instead of A to remind myself to be explorative.
Example:
C: New clothes delivered to the house
TD: Will they fit, will I like them on my body, will I be making a trip to the store to return them, will I have to get a larger size
T: Will they fit
E: Anxiety
A: Procrastinate trying on till I’m “in the mood”, psych myself up to try them on
R: Try on clothes in a stressed and critical state
T: Will I like them on my body
E:
A’s:
R:
T: Will I be making a trip to the store to return them,
E:
A’s:
R:
T: Will I have to get a larger size
E:
A’s
R:
The same pattern for your other model…
And on your question: We did showcase the model in Lesson 2 video but perhaps not as much as we should. So based on your feedback, we are going to go ahead and update the worksheet for Lesson 2 to add a section to recap the model. Give us a couple of days to do this.
In the meantime, here’s what we will add to the worksheet for lesson 2, so you don’t have to wait:
The self-coaching model is an easy way to see how our thoughts play out in our lives and create the reality we experience. The framework of the self-coaching model allows you to trace the causal relationship from your thoughts to your result (reality your experience in your current life).
The Model:
C: Circumstance: Neutral facts of the situation that are outside of your current, immediate control
TD: Thought Download: All the thoughts you have about the circumstance
T: Thought: A story your mind tells, which lead to a feeling in your body
F: Feeling: Physical sensations in your body, which lead to actions (and inaction)
A’s: Action: How you behave when you think the thought and feel the feeling in the F line (may not reflect what you actually did or would do, but rather what you would do if you acted ONLY from the feeling in the F line.
R: Result: The outcome of your thought, feeling and actions / inactions, as they pertain to you, for this specific situation (circumstance).